01 Nov 1993, San Francisco, California, USA — Singer-songwriter, composer, and actor, Tom Waits at the Limbo Lounge Diner in San Francisco. — Image by © Ed Kashi/Corbis
I have a secret I must confess
I want to be Tom’s waitress
I want to be the woman who holds the flame
that lights the cigarette of the holy gravelly voiced one in a game
of coffee and rolls adoration
hopeless hospitality infatuation
I want to stand at his table with his head at my torso
ask him what he wants and point out that also
we have love consuming wine to go with his meal
and like Mary Magdelene at his feet I will kneel
shine up his shoes with spittle of awe
tickle his toes so I can hear him guffaw
yes yes I must confess
I want to be Tom’s waitress
I want to be Tom’s waitress
not such an impossible dream I guess
I could find him in America by sailing across the sea
pull pen and pad out of pocket and say so baby what’ll it be
I could sing you a song about toasted cheese sangers
or perhaps you’d prefer to eat mash and bangers
I know a cool poem about being perpetually drunk
or we could gaily swap stories on the virtues of punk
I could serve you up a slice of our best grapefruit moon
and while you’re consuming it I’ll quietly swoon
I’d pluck up the courage when time was in fullness
and say I’ve always wanted to meet you your coolness
yes yes I must confess
I want to be tom’s waitress
I want to be the waitress of Tom
not his daughter or lover or sister or mom
just an anonymous girl in his old café scene
that he strikes up a chat with at the coffee machine
a charmed willing object for his observation
transformed into lyrics via sweet inspiration
and when he’s busily chopping out that song
I’d jump in his piano and say take me along
I’ll serve you up pancakes with wasabi and mustard
he’ll look at me strange and say baby you’ve lost it
but a look is a look and it’s enough to satisfy
and I’d drink in that glorious gaze and happily die
yes yes I must confess
I want to be Tom’s waitress
tom’s waitress is published in you near verse (2014) selected poems by vasudha harte
recorded versions are available on stereognostic (2011) by dinkum bohos and an evening of poetry and music (2015) by dinkum bohos www.thedinkumbohos.bandcamp.com
